<?xml version="1.0" encoding="iso-8859-1"?><rss version="1.0"><channel><title>Diary of Jolly</title><link>http://blackswan.rediffiland.com/</link><description>Diary of Jolly</description><language>en-us</language><item><title>Relax, chill out, just flow ......</title><description><![CDATA[<p><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 153); font-family: Verdana,Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;">And now, after the sombre mood, time for some humour :) The following clips are from a universally loved movie that was based on a great book, 'The Jungle Book'. So friends, time to pause, take a break and have a dekko again at some innocent light-hearted fun :)</span></p><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 153); font-family: Verdana,Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;">I dedicate this to my friend Freedom Unbound for his super-cool attitude towards life :)))</span><br><br style="color: rgb(0, 0, 153); font-family: Verdana,Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;"><object style="color: rgb(0, 0, 153); font-family: Verdana,Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;" height="344" width="425"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/9ogQ0uge06o&amp;hl=en&amp;fs=1"><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/9ogQ0uge06o&amp;hl=en&amp;fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowfullscreen="true" height="344" width="425"></object><br style="color: rgb(0, 0, 153); font-family: Verdana,Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;"><br style="color: rgb(0, 0, 153); font-family: Verdana,Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;"><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 153); font-family: Verdana,Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;"></span><br style="color: rgb(0, 0, 153); font-family: Verdana,Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;"><span style="font-weight: bold; font-style: italic;">Bare necessities</span><br style="font-style: italic;"><span style="font-style: italic;">Look for the bare necessities</span><br style="font-style: italic;"><span style="font-style: italic;"><BR>The simple bare necessities</span><br style="font-style: italic;"><span style="font-style: italic;"><BR>Forget about your worries and your strife</span><br style="font-style: italic;"><span style="font-style: italic;"><BR>I mean the bare necessities</span><br style="font-style: italic;"><span style="font-style: italic;"><BR>Old Mother Nature's recipes</span><br style="font-style: italic;"><span style="font-style: italic;"><BR>That brings the bare necessities of life</span><br style="font-style: italic;"><BR><br style="font-style: italic;"><span style="font-style: italic;"><BR>Wherever I wander, wherever I roam</span><br style="font-style: italic;"><span style="font-style: italic;"><BR>I couldn't be fonder of my big home</span><br style="font-style: italic;"><span style="font-style: italic;"><BR>The bees are buzzin' in the tree</span><br style="font-style: italic;"><span style="font-style: italic;"><BR>To make some honey just for me</span><br style="font-style: italic;"><span style="font-style: italic;"><BR>When you look under the rocks and plants</span><br style="font-style: italic;"><span style="font-style: italic;"><BR>And take a glance at the fancy ants</span><br style="font-style: italic;"><span style="font-style: italic;"><BR>Then maybe try a few</span><br style="font-style: italic;"><BR><br style="font-style: italic;"><span style="font-style: italic;"><BR>The bare necessities of life will come to you</span><br style="font-style: italic;"><span style="font-style: italic;"><BR>They'll come to you!</span><br style="font-style: italic;"><BR><br style="font-style: italic;"><span style="font-style: italic;"><BR>Look for the bare necessities</span><br style="font-style: italic;"><span style="font-style: italic;"><BR>The simple bare necessities</span><br style="font-style: italic;"><span style="font-style: italic;"><BR>Forget about your worries and your strife</span><br style="font-style: italic;"><span style="font-style: italic;"><BR>I mean the bare necessities </span><br style="font-style: italic;"><span style="font-style: italic;"><BR>That's why a bear can rest at ease</span><br style="font-style: italic;"><span style="font-style: italic;"><BR>With just the bare necessities of life</span><br style="font-style: italic;"><BR><br style="font-style: italic;"><span style="font-style: italic;"><BR>Now when you pick a pawpaw</span><br style="font-style: italic;"><span style="font-style: italic;"><BR>Or a prickly pear</span><br style="font-style: italic;"><span style="font-style: italic;"><BR>And you prick a raw paw</span><br style="font-style: italic;"><span style="font-style: italic;"><BR>Next time beware</span><br style="font-style: italic;"><span style="font-style: italic;"><BR>Don't pick the prickly pear by the paw</span><br style="font-style: italic;"><span style="font-style: italic;"><BR>When you pick a pear</span><br style="font-style: italic;"><span style="font-style: italic;"><BR>Try to use the claw</span><br style="font-style: italic;"><span style="font-style: italic;"><BR>But you don't need to use the claw</span><br style="font-style: italic;"><span style="font-style: italic;"><BR>When you pick a pear of the big pawpaw</span><br style="font-style: italic;"><span style="font-style: italic;"><BR>Have I given you a clue ?</span><br style="font-style: italic;"><BR><br style="font-style: italic;"><span style="font-style: italic;"><BR>The bare necessities of life will come to you</span><br style="font-style: italic;"><span style="font-style: italic;"><BR>They'll come to you!</span><br style="font-style: italic;"><BR><br style="font-style: italic;"><span style="font-style: italic;"><BR>So just try and relax, yeah cool it</span><br style="font-style: italic;"><span style="font-style: italic;"><BR>Fall apart in my backyard</span><br style="font-style: italic;"><span style="font-style: italic;"><BR>'Cause let me tell you something little britches</span><br style="font-style: italic;"><span style="font-style: italic;"><BR>If you act like that bee acts, uh uh</span><br style="font-style: italic;"><span style="font-style: italic;"><BR>You're working too hard</span><br style="font-style: italic;"><BR><br style="font-style: italic;"><span style="font-style: italic;"><BR>And don't spend your time lookin' around</span><br style="font-style: italic;"><span style="font-style: italic;"><BR>For something you want that can't be found</span><br style="font-style: italic;"><span style="font-style: italic;"><BR>When you find out you can live without it</span><br style="font-style: italic;"><span style="font-style: italic;"><BR>And go along not thinkin' about it</span><br style="font-style: italic;"><span style="font-style: italic;"><BR>I'll tell you something true</span><br style="font-style: italic;"><BR><br style="font-style: italic;"><span style="font-style: italic;"><BR>The bare necessities of life will come to you</span><br><BR> <br style="color: rgb(0, 0, 153); font-family: Verdana,Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;"><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 153); font-family: Verdana,Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;">This one's just as funny :)</span><br style="color: rgb(0, 0, 153); font-family: Verdana,Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;"><br style="color: rgb(0, 0, 153); font-family: Verdana,Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;"><object style="color: rgb(0, 0, 153); font-family: Verdana,Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;" height="344" width="425"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/Y5ojV1r1XHM&amp;hl=en&amp;fs=1"><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/Y5ojV1r1XHM&amp;hl=en&amp;fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowfullscreen="true" height="344" width="425"></object><br style="color: rgb(0, 0, 153); font-family: Verdana,Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;"><br style="color: rgb(0, 0, 153); font-family: Verdana,Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;"><br style="color: rgb(0, 0, 153); font-family: Verdana,Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;"><br><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 153); font-style: italic; font-family: Verdana,Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;">Cheerio :)</span><br><br><br><br><br><br><br><br><BR><BR>]]></description><pubDate>Mon, 01 Sep 2008 02:54:15 +0530</pubDate><link>http://blackswan.rediffiland.com/blogs/2008/09/01/Relax-chill-out-just-flow.html</link></item><item><title>An Afternoon Requiem</title><description><![CDATA[<P><FONT color=#666666><SPAN lang=en-us><FONT face=Verdana size=2><EM>(A short, dark story for those who complain about the lengthiness of my stories :))</EM></FONT></SPAN> </FONT></P><P><SPAN lang=en-us><FONT face=Verdana size=2>She's watching the window intently, as the wind picks up the stormy rain and lashes it against the glass. As though Nature is throwing a huge tantrum and flinging the elements about in fury. </FONT></SPAN><SPAN lang=en-us><FONT face=Verdana size=2>It soothes her somehow. </FONT></SPAN><SPAN lang=en-us><FONT face=Verdana size=2>The chaos inside her subsides in the face of the turbulence outside. Drops hit the glass with clattering ferocity, break apart and fly back to join the driving wind and the uproarious rain. And the remnants join up with others and slide down the glass in trembling rivulets. As if in response to the increasing calm within her, the wind slowly dies down too, and now there's only a steady beat of rain, that flicks an occasional drop towards the window, and raindrops hang clutching at the glass, defying gravity until they swell enough to slide away.<BR></FONT></SPAN></P><P><SPAN lang=en-us><FONT face=Verdana size=2>In the moisture-laden calmness, the air heavy with the secrets that the rain and wind have gathered from far away and dispersed into people's rooms - the sighs of heartbreak and the soft whispers of dreams crumbled in the hearts of strangers - she feels her own heart swell and strain against the steel of her heart walls. Walls she had started putting up a long time ago, when orphaned suddenly, she had gone to live in her aunt's house, the youngest there, the most vulnerable and the most unwanted. Smiling through tears, laughing through rejection, excelling in academics to compensate for her loss everywhere else. Slowly, unknowingly even to herself, she had built her walls, added layers, then bolts and latches, her defence against the pain of loneliness and rejection. Silken and unshakable, she had slowly but surely marked her ascension in the corporate world through one remarkable success after another. Men looked at her with respect, or flattering obeisance, a mask for the envy they felt and sometimes the desire that glimmered momentarily in their eyes. </FONT></SPAN><SPAN lang=en-us><FONT face=Verdana size=2>But none had conquered her heart.</FONT></SPAN><BR><SPAN lang=en-us><FONT face=Verdana size=2><BR>All along she had waited for the one man for whom she could unlatch her heart and unbolt her soul. But he had never come. Now, as the rain drums its fingers on asphalt, stone and glass, and moved by the murmurings the wind has left behind, her heart unfolds its wings and flutters, longing to fly free. But habit is a hard taskmaster and fear is a cruel one and the loyal steel clamps down and crushes those tentative wings. Only a sob escapes her lips and clouds her vision. Hastily, as if to ward off these intruders, her hand flies to her mouth, and she shuts tight her eyes.<BR></FONT></SPAN></P><P><SPAN lang=en-us><FONT face=Verdana size=2>When she opens her eyes again, to her utter surprise, there is a red drop sitting on the glass, like a perfectly formed drop of blood, taut and turgid. It takes a few moments for her brain to tell her that it could be the reflection of something red falling on the drop of water. But somehow, that tantalising image of the blood-red drop makes her think of Him. Her gaze immediately shifts to her wrist, and she caresses the soft skin with the tips of her fingers. The veins stretch blue against the pale skin, thin tributaries carrying life, and she can see her pulse throbbing. Anticipation makes it throb faster and she feels the beat echo loudly in her chest. Desire courses through her body and she feels a slight chill shiver through her spine. Her breath quickens on the thought of the razor blade, sitting in a drawer nearby, waiting to be picked up and sliced through the paper-thin skin of her wrist, the supple veins and the elastic tendons.</FONT></SPAN></P><P><SPAN lang=en-us><FONT face=Verdana size=2>Will He come quickly, she wonders, will His touch be painless or will her body convulse with pain as it does in pleasure? Will she moan in pain as she does with joy? Which part of her will He enter first? How long will it be before she reaches the peak of agony and succumbs to His dark arms, its comforting numbness and its obliterating surrender? Her Dark Knight, before He takes her into the night forever.</FONT></SPAN></P><SPAN lang=en-us><FONT face=Verdana size=2>The rain outside seems to be singing the Requiem.</FONT></SPAN> ]]></description><pubDate>Tue, 26 Aug 2008 04:08:40 +0530</pubDate><link>http://blackswan.rediffiland.com/blogs/2008/08/26/An-Afternoon-Requiem-1.html</link></item><item><title>The power of dreams</title><description><![CDATA[<BR><span style="font-family: verdana,sans-serif;">I was in between jobs and had decided to take a break. I was driving solo up north in the Lake Taupo region looking for interesting things to see when I saw a sign saying "NZ woodcraft and ceramics". <br><br>On an impulse I took the detour and went into the shop. Inside were a great many fine woodturned bowls and other items in kauri and rimu and other types of wood. The grain in the wood had created beautiful patterns so that each one of them was a unique piece, with its own stamp and signature. Whorls and twirls and lines that only nature can create and we can only imitate.<br><br style="font-family: verdana,sans-serif;"></span><span style="font-family: verdana,sans-serif;">Halfway through I saw a sign that said that Chris was selling his business and tools etc. On the way out I walked over to the man at the counter and asked him, "Are you Chris?"<br><br>"Yes"<br><br>"Are you selling your business?"<br><br>"Yes"<br><br>"Why?" <br><br>"Because I have been doing it for the past 20 years and now I want to fly planes instead". <br><br>Mind you, Chris looked like he was in his fifties, so rather doubtfully I asked "Oh, you want to become a pilot?"<br><br>"Yes, I have been training to fly for the last four years."<br><br> "And fly commercial flights?" <br><br>"No, I am too old for that, but I would like to fly planes that are used for top-dressing"<br><br>"What is that?"<br><br>"Planes that spray fertiliser on fields"<br><br>"Then what about woodturning, are you going to give it up? This is such a major switch, are you going to give up your passion?"<br><br>"Yes, it is a major switch, that is why I have been training to fly. But woodturning is not my passion, now it is just a job that has to be done, even though it began as a passion. Now flying is my passion. I took my first flight when I was five and decided then that I would fly someday even though it took me 55 years to fulfill my dream".<br><br></span><span style="font-family: verdana,sans-serif;">I was so impressed and moved by this that I asked to take his photograph in front of the pictures of the planes that he had up put up. He kindly obliged.<br><br></span><span style="font-family: verdana,sans-serif;">It is never too late to realise your dreams, so what if you are only a few steps away from the grave. It is just that you should never let go of them. Meeting Chris was such a valuable lesson for me.<br><br>These days, I'm sure Chris is up in the sky somewhere, flying his plane, doing what makes his heart sing and his soul dance.<br><br></span><br><BR><br><img src="http://ri.rediffiland.com/homepimages/home2/934/4546da17103e1693acf88b9beb5fdcd3/homep/images/1219097861">]]></description><pubDate>Tue, 19 Aug 2008 03:45:37 +0530</pubDate><link>http://blackswan.rediffiland.com/blogs/2008/08/19/The-power-of-dreams-1.html</link></item><item><title>Gull politics</title><description><![CDATA[<FONT face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" color=#000066>It is Saturday and Hubby and I are engaged in shopping. We take a break at lunchtime and are eating finger chips sitting on a bench on the beach. Soon we are joined by a lone seagull, orange beak, orange feet and orange lined eyes. Hubby throws bits of chips at him and the gull merrily gorges on junk food. We wonder about the fact that he does not even utter a quack to signal to his gull mates that there is food available. But soon another seagull joins us and then the fun begins. Gull no.1 undergoes a transformation. He starts squawking hoarsely and runs after gull no.2, pointed beak open, trying to run him off the place.<BR><BR>Now No.2 is a smart fellow, he retreats strategically to the back of the bench where he is content with the bits that Hubby throws backwards occasionally. But No.1's squawks have attracted others of his kind and soon we are a happy crowd of about 5-6 gulls, some of these, we notice have black feet, beak and kohl-lined eyes. Owing to the fact that these black-eyed beauties are hovering on the fringes, and are smaller in size than the more flamboyant orange-eyed fellas, we conclude that these must be the females. <BR><BR>No.1 is now really busy because more gulls are arriving by the minute and he is spending so much time squawking after them and chasing them that he has ceased to notice that bits of food are still being given. In the midst of his squawking and frantic chasing, the newcomers manage to snatch up the food which he has ignored probably with the mistaken belief that he can run all the others off and be the only partaker of the food. <BR><BR>No.2 at the back has also established his territory and is valiantly defending his turf. I cannot help think that this is precisely how humans behave too. We are so busy fighting over land and territory that sometimes the basic needs of our people get forgotten. There are some countries who probably spend more of their GDP in defense expenditure than in providing food and basic amenities to its people. Even though we know that there is enough resouces to feed the whole world, some of us are intent on cornering most of it in a concerted attempt to have more of more so that others can have less of less. When the US went to war in Iraq, they increased their defense budget and guess where the money came from. Some of it came from social welfare, elderly care and basic medical care. They actually cut back spending on these areas. <BR><BR>Sad to think that we are not so highly evolved after all.</FONT> :( <BR><BR>]]></description><pubDate>Fri, 08 Aug 2008 07:40:41 +0530</pubDate><link>http://blackswan.rediffiland.com/blogs/2008/08/08/Gull-politics-1.html</link></item><item><title>What does love mean?</title><description><![CDATA[<BR><p><font face="Verdana">Slow down for three minutes to read this. It is so worth it. Touching words from the mouths of babes. What does "Love" mean?<br><br>A group of professional people posed this question to a group of 4 to 8 year-olds, "What does "love" mean?"<br><br>The answers they got were broader and deeper than anyone could have imagined. See what you think: </font><br></p><br><p style="color: rgb(0, 102, 0);" align="center"><font face="Verdana">"When my grandmother got arthritis, she couldn"t bend over and paint her toenails anymore.<br>So my grandfather does it for her all the time, even when his hands got arthritis too. That"s love."<br><br>Rebecca- age 8 </font></p><br style="color: rgb(0, 102, 0);"><p style="color: rgb(0, 102, 0);" align="center"><font face="Verdana"><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);">"When someone loves you, the way they say your name is different.</span><br style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);">You just know that your name is safe in their mouth."</span><br style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><br style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);">Billy - age 4</span> </font></p><br style="color: rgb(0, 102, 0);"><p style="color: rgb(0, 102, 0);" align="center"><font face="Verdana">"Love is when a girl puts on perfume and a boy puts on shaving cologne and they go out and smell each other."<br><br>Karl - age 5 </font></p><br style="color: rgb(0, 102, 0);"><p style="color: rgb(0, 102, 0);" align="center"><font face="Verdana"><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);">"Love is when you go out to eat and give somebody most of your French fries without making them give you any of theirs."</span><br style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><br style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);">Chrissie - age 6</span> </font></p><br style="color: rgb(0, 102, 0);"><p style="color: rgb(0, 102, 0);" align="center"><font face="Verdana">"Love is what makes you smile when you"re tired."<br><br>Terri - age 4 </font></p><br style="color: rgb(0, 102, 0);"><p style="color: rgb(0, 102, 0);" align="center"><font face="Verdana"><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);">"Love is when my mummy makes coffee for my daddy and she takes a sip before giving it to him, to make sure the taste is OK."</span><br style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><br style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);">Danny - age 7</span> </font></p><br style="color: rgb(0, 102, 0);"><p style="color: rgb(0, 102, 0);" align="center"><font face="Verdana">"Love is when you kiss all the time. Then when you get tired of kissing, you still want to be together and you talk more.<br><br>My Mummy and Daddy are like that. They look gross when they kiss"<br><br>Emily - age 8 </font></p><br style="color: rgb(0, 102, 0);"><p style="color: rgb(0, 102, 0);" align="center"><font face="Verdana"><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);">"Love is what"s in the room with you at Christmas if you stop opening presents and listen."</span><br style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><br style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);">Bobby - age 7 (Wow!)</span> </font></p><br style="color: rgb(0, 102, 0);"><p style="color: rgb(0, 102, 0);" align="center"><font face="Verdana">"If you want to learn to love better, you should start with a friend who you hate,"<br><br>Nikka - age 6<br><br>(we need a few million more Nikka"s on this planet) <br><br></font></p><br style="color: rgb(0, 102, 0);"><p style="color: rgb(0, 102, 0);" align="center"><font face="Verdana"><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);">"Love is when you tell a guy you like his shirt, then he wears it everyday."</span><br style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><br style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);">Noelle - age 7</span> </font></p><br style="color: rgb(0, 102, 0);"><p style="color: rgb(0, 102, 0);" align="center"><font face="Verdana">"Love is like a little old woman and a little old man who are still friends even after they know each other so well."<br><br>Tommy - age 6 </font></p><br style="color: rgb(0, 102, 0);"><p style="color: rgb(0, 102, 0);" align="center"><font face="Verdana"><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);">"During my piano recital, I was on a stage and I was scared. I looked at all the people watching me and saw my daddy waving and smiling.</span><br style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><br style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);">He was the only one doing that. I wasn"t scared anymore."</span><br style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><br style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);">Cindy - age 8</span> </font></p><br style="color: rgb(0, 102, 0);"><p style="color: rgb(0, 102, 0);" align="center"><font face="Verdana">"My mummy loves me more than anybody<br>You don"t see anyone else kissing me to sleep at night."<br><br>Clare - age 6 </font></p><br style="color: rgb(0, 102, 0);"><p style="color: rgb(0, 102, 0);" align="center"><font face="Verdana"><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);">"Love is when Mummy gives Daddy the best piece of chicken."</span><br style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><br style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);">Elaine-age 5</span> </font></p><br style="color: rgb(0, 102, 0);"><p style="color: rgb(0, 102, 0);" align="center"><font face="Verdana">"Love is when Mummy sees Daddy smelly and sweaty and still says he is handsomer than Robert Redford."<br><br>Chris - age 7 </font></p><br style="color: rgb(0, 102, 0);"><p style="color: rgb(0, 102, 0);" align="center"><font face="Verdana"><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);">"Love is when your puppy licks your face even after you left him alone all day"</span><br style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><br style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);">Mary Ann - age 4</span> </font></p><br style="color: rgb(0, 102, 0);"><p style="color: rgb(0, 102, 0);" align="center"><font face="Verdana">"I know my older sister loves me because she gives me all her old clothes and has to go out and buy new ones."<br><br>Lauren - age 4 </font></p><br style="color: rgb(0, 102, 0);"><p style="color: rgb(0, 102, 0);" align="center"><font face="Verdana"><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);">"When you love somebody, your eyelashes go up and down and little stars come out of you." (what an image)</span><br style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><br style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);">Karen - age 7</span> </font></p><br style="color: rgb(0, 102, 0);"><p style="color: rgb(0, 102, 0);" align="center"><font face="Verdana">"Love is when Mummy sees Daddy on the toilet and she doesn"t think it"s gross."<br><br>Mark - age 6 </font></p><br style="color: rgb(0, 102, 0);"><p style="color: rgb(0, 102, 0);" align="center"><font face="Verdana"><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);">"You really shouldn"t say "I love you" unless you mean it. But if you mean it, you should say it a lot. People forget."</span><br style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><br style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);"><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 102);">Jessica - age 8</span> </font></p><br style="color: rgb(0, 102, 0);"><p align="center"><font style="color: rgb(0, 102, 0);" face="Verdana">And the final one -- Author and lecturer Leo Buscaglia once talked about a contest he was asked to judge.<br><br>The purpose of the contest was to find the most caring child.<br><br>The winner was a four year old child whose next door neighbor was an elderly gentleman who had recently lost his wife.<br><br>Upon seeing the man cry, the little boy went into the old gentleman"s yard, climbed onto his lap, and just sat there.<br><br>When his Mother asked what he had said to the neighbour, the little boy said,</font><br style="color: rgb(0, 102, 0);"><br style="color: rgb(0, 102, 0);"><font face="Verdana"><span style="color: rgb(0, 102, 0);">"Nothing, I just helped him cry"</span> </font></p><br><br><font face="Verdana">When there is nothing left,</font> <font face="Verdana">that is when you find out that</font> <font face="Verdana">love is all you need. </font><br><br><br><br><BR>]]></description><pubDate>Fri, 01 Aug 2008 02:49:02 +0530</pubDate><link>http://blackswan.rediffiland.com/blogs/2008/08/01/What-does-love-mean.html</link></item><item><title>Let life in</title><description><![CDATA[<span style="color: rgb(153, 0, 0);"><BR>On your way to work this morning, did you notice</span><br style="color: rgb(153, 0, 0);"><span style="color: rgb(153, 0, 0);">the beggar child, eyes filled with tears,</span><br style="color: rgb(153, 0, 0);"><span style="color: rgb(153, 0, 0);">face pinched by hardship?</span><br style="color: rgb(153, 0, 0);"><span style="color: rgb(153, 0, 0);">Or your own beggar-heart</span><br style="color: rgb(153, 0, 0);"><span style="color: rgb(153, 0, 0);">starved for love, for light.</span><br style="color: rgb(153, 0, 0);"><br style="color: rgb(153, 0, 0);"><span style="color: rgb(153, 0, 0);">In the din of traffic, did you hear</span><br style="color: rgb(153, 0, 0);"><span style="color: rgb(153, 0, 0);">the lonely call of a solitary bird</span><br style="color: rgb(153, 0, 0);"><span style="color: rgb(153, 0, 0);">perched high on a light-pole?</span><br style="color: rgb(153, 0, 0);"><span style="color: rgb(153, 0, 0);">Or your soul"s desperate plea</span><br style="color: rgb(153, 0, 0);"><span style="color: rgb(153, 0, 0);">To sing its own song?</span><br style="color: rgb(153, 0, 0);"><br style="color: rgb(153, 0, 0);"><span style="color: rgb(153, 0, 0);">Juggling deadlines,</span><br style="color: rgb(153, 0, 0);"><span style="color: rgb(153, 0, 0);">did you pause to consider,</span><br style="color: rgb(153, 0, 0);"><span style="color: rgb(153, 0, 0);">that you too have an expiry date?</span><br style="color: rgb(153, 0, 0);"><span style="color: rgb(153, 0, 0);">That, your life is waiting to be taken as a gift</span><br style="color: rgb(153, 0, 0);"><span style="color: rgb(153, 0, 0);">and lived.</span><br style="color: rgb(153, 0, 0);"><br style="color: rgb(153, 0, 0);"><span style="color: rgb(153, 0, 0);">Does your smile reach your eyes,</span><br style="color: rgb(153, 0, 0);"><span style="color: rgb(153, 0, 0);">does it reach the other"s heart?</span><br style="color: rgb(153, 0, 0);"><span style="color: rgb(153, 0, 0);">Are the windows of your eyes shut tight</span><br style="color: rgb(153, 0, 0);"><span style="color: rgb(153, 0, 0);">with worry and distraction?</span><br style="color: rgb(153, 0, 0);"><span style="color: rgb(153, 0, 0);">Does suspicion clog your heart-valves?</span><br style="color: rgb(153, 0, 0);"><br style="color: rgb(153, 0, 0);"><span style="color: rgb(153, 0, 0);">Is coffee the only thing that lifts you up,</span><br style="color: rgb(153, 0, 0);"><span style="color: rgb(153, 0, 0);">or alcohol?</span><br style="color: rgb(153, 0, 0);"><span style="color: rgb(153, 0, 0);">What about laughing child-eyes</span><br style="color: rgb(153, 0, 0);"><span style="color: rgb(153, 0, 0);">or the lift and sweep of a soaring seagull?</span><br style="color: rgb(153, 0, 0);"><span style="color: rgb(153, 0, 0);">or the joy that comes from within.</span><br style="color: rgb(153, 0, 0);"><br style="color: rgb(153, 0, 0);"><span style="color: rgb(153, 0, 0);">Is life passing you by,</span><br style="color: rgb(153, 0, 0);"><span style="color: rgb(153, 0, 0);">while you</span><br style="color: rgb(153, 0, 0);"><span style="color: rgb(153, 0, 0);">play out the various roles in a life not quite yours?</span><br style="color: rgb(153, 0, 0);"><span style="color: rgb(153, 0, 0);">If life comes knocking,</span><br style="color: rgb(153, 0, 0);"><span style="color: rgb(153, 0, 0);">are you busy in another existence?</span><br style="color: rgb(153, 0, 0);"><br style="color: rgb(153, 0, 0);"><span style="color: rgb(153, 0, 0);">It"s time to let life in.<BR></span>]]></description><pubDate>Wed, 23 Jul 2008 13:25:58 +0530</pubDate><link>http://blackswan.rediffiland.com/blogs/2008/07/23/Let-life-in-1.html</link></item><item><title>The Fringe Benefits of Failure, and the Importance of Imagination</title><description><![CDATA[<BR><p><i><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">Speech given by J.K.Rowling at the 2008 Harvard University Commencement, June 5, 2008. </font></i></p><p><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif"><i>Copyright of J.K. Rowling, June 2008</i><br></font><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">June 5, 2008 · President Faust, members of the Harvard Corporation and the Board of Overseers, members of the faculty, proud parents, and, above all, graduates, </font></p><p><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">The first thing I would like to say is "thank you." Not only has Harvard given me an extraordinary honor, but the weeks of fear and nausea I"ve experienced at the thought of giving this commencement address have made me lose weight. A win-win situation! Now all I have to do is take deep breaths, squint at the red banners and fool myself into believing I am at the world"s best-educated Harry Potter convention. </font></p><p><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">Delivering a commencement address is a great responsibility; or so I thought until I cast my mind back to my own graduation. The commencement speaker that day was the distinguished British philosopher Baroness Mary Warnock. Reflecting on her speech has helped me enormously in writing this one, because it turns out that I can"t remember a single word she said. This liberating discovery enables me to proceed without any fear that I might inadvertently influence you to abandon promising careers in business, law or politics for the giddy delights of becoming a gay wizard. <br></font></p><br><p><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">You see? If all you remember in years to come is the "gay wizard" joke, I"ve still come out ahead of Baroness Mary Warnock. Achievable goals: the first step towards personal improvement. </font></p><p><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">Actually, I have wracked my mind and heart for what I ought to say to you today. I have asked myself what I wish I had known at my own graduation, and what important lessons I have learned in the 21 years that has expired between that day and this. </font></p><p><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">I have come up with two answers. On this wonderful day when we are gathered together to celebrate your academic success, I have decided to talk to you about the benefits of failure. And as you stand on the threshold of what is sometimes called "real life", I want to extol the crucial importance of imagination. </font></p><p><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">These might seem quixotic or paradoxical choices, but please bear with me. <br><br>Looking back at the 21-year-old that I was at graduation, is a slightly uncomfortable experience for the 42-year-old that she has become. Half my lifetime ago, I was striking an uneasy balance between the ambition I had for myself, and what those closest to me expected of me. </font></p><p><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">I was convinced that the only thing I wanted to do, ever, was to write novels. However, my parents, both of whom came from impoverished backgrounds and neither of whom had been to college, took the view that my overactive imagination was an amusing personal quirk that could never pay a mortgage, or secure a pension. </font></p><p><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">They had hoped that I would take a vocational degree; I wanted to study English Literature. A compromise was reached that in retrospect satisfied nobody, and I went up to study Modern Languages. Hardly had my parents" car rounded the corner at the end of the road than I ditched German and scuttled off down the Classics corridor. </font></p><p><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">I cannot remember telling my parents that I was studying Classics; they might well have found out for the first time on graduation day. Of all subjects on this planet, I think they would have been hard put to name one less useful than Greek mythology when it came to securing the keys to an executive bathroom. </font></p><p><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">I would like to make it clear, in parenthesis, that I do not blame my parents for their point of view. There is an expiry date on blaming your parents for steering you in the wrong direction; the moment you are old enough to take the wheel, responsibility lies with you. What is more, I cannot criticize my parents for hoping that I would never experience poverty. They had been poor themselves, and I have since been poor, and I quite agree with them that it is not an ennobling experience. Poverty entails fear, and stress, and sometimes depression; it means a thousand petty humiliations and hardships. Climbing out of poverty by your own efforts, that is indeed something on which to pride yourself, but poverty itself is romanticized only by fools. </font></p><p><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">What I feared most for myself at your age was not poverty, but failure. <br><br>At your age, in spite of a distinct lack of motivation at university, where I had spent far too long in the coffee bar writing stories, and far too little time at lectures, I had a knack for passing examinations, and that, for years, had been the measure of success in my life and that of my peers. </font></p><p><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">I am not dull enough to suppose that because you are young, gifted and well-educated, you have never known hardship or heartbreak. Talent and intelligence never yet inoculated anyone against the caprice of the Fates, and I do not for a moment suppose that everyone here has enjoyed an existence of unruffled privilege and contentment. </font></p><p><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">However, the fact that you are graduating from Harvard suggests that you are not very well-acquainted with failure. You might be driven by a fear of failure quite as much as a desire for success. Indeed, your conception of failure might not be too far from the average person"s idea of success, so high have you already flown academically. </font></p><p><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">Ultimately, we all have to decide for ourselves what constitutes failure, but the world is quite eager to give you a set of criteria if you let it. So I think it fair to say that by any conventional measure, a mere seven years after my graduation day, I had failed on an epic scale. An exceptionally short-lived marriage had imploded, and I was jobless, a lone parent, and as poor as it is possible to be in modern Britain, without being homeless. The fears my parents had had for me, and that I had had for myself, had both come to pass, and by every usual standard, I was the biggest failure I knew. </font></p><p><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">Now, I am not going to stand here and tell you that failure is fun. That period of my life was a dark one, and I had no idea that there was going to be what the press has since represented as a kind of fairy tale resolution. I had no idea how far the tunnel extended, and for a long time, any light at the end of it was a hope rather than a reality. </font></p><p><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">So why do I talk about the benefits of failure? Simply because failure meant a stripping away of the inessential. I stopped pretending to myself that I was anything other than what I was, and began to direct all my energy into finishing the only work that mattered to me. Had I really succeeded at anything else, I might never have found the determination to succeed in the one arena I believed I truly belonged. I was set free, because my greatest fear had already been realized, and I was still alive, and I still had a daughter whom I adored, and I had an old typewriter and a big idea. And so rock bottom became the solid foundation on which I rebuilt my life. </font></p><p><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">You might never fail on the scale I did, but some failure in life is inevitable. It is impossible to live without failing at something, unless you live so cautiously that you might as well not have lived at all  in which case, you fail by default. </font></p><p><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">Failure gave me an inner security that I had never attained by passing examinations. Failure taught me things about myself that I could have learned no other way. I discovered that I had a strong will, and more discipline than I had suspected; I also found out that I had friends whose value was truly above rubies. </font></p><p><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">The knowledge that you have emerged wiser and stronger from setbacks means that you are, ever after, secure in your ability to survive. You will never truly know yourself, or the strength of your relationships, until both have been tested by adversity. Such knowledge is a true gift, for all that it is painfully won, and it has been worth more to me than any qualification I ever earned. </font></p><p><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">Given a time machine or a Time Turner, I would tell my 21-year-old self that personal happiness lies in knowing that life is not a check-list of acquisition or achievement. Your qualifications, your CV, are not your life, though you will meet many people of my age and older who confuse the two. Life is difficult, and complicated, and beyond anyone"s total control, and the humility to know that will enable you to survive its vicissitudes. </font></p><p><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">You might think that I chose my second theme, the importance of imagination, because of the part it played in rebuilding my life, but that is not wholly so. Though I will defend the value of bedtime stories to my last gasp, I have learned to value imagination in a much broader sense. Imagination is not only the uniquely human capacity to envision that which is not, and therefore the fount of all invention and innovation. In its arguably most transformative and revelatory capacity, it is the power that enables us to empathize with humans whose experiences we have never shared. </font></p><p><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">One of the greatest formative experiences of my life preceded Harry Potter, though it informed much of what I subsequently wrote in those books. This revelation came in the form of one of my earliest day jobs. Though I was sloping off to write stories during my lunch hours, I paid the rent in my early 20s by working in the research department at Amnesty International"s headquarters in London. </font></p><p><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">There in my little office I read hastily scribbled letters smuggled out of totalitarian regimes by men and women who were risking imprisonment to inform the outside world of what was happening to them. I saw photographs of those who had disappeared without trace, sent to Amnesty by their desperate families and friends. I read the testimony of torture victims and saw pictures of their injuries. I opened handwritten, eye-witness accounts of summary trials and executions, of kidnappings and rapes. </font></p><p><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">Many of my co-workers were ex-political prisoners, people who had been displaced from their homes, or fled into exile, because they had the temerity to think independently of their government. Visitors to our office included those who had come to give information, or to try and find out what had happened to those they had been forced to leave behind. </font></p><p><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">I shall never forget the African torture victim, a young man no older than I was at the time, who had become mentally ill after all he had endured in his homeland. He trembled uncontrollably as he spoke into a video camera about the brutality inflicted upon him. He was a foot taller than I was, and seemed as fragile as a child. I was given the job of escorting him to the Underground Station afterwards, and this man whose life had been shattered by cruelty took my hand with exquisite courtesy, and wished me future happiness. </font></p><p><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">And as long as I live I shall remember walking along an empty corridor and suddenly hearing, from behind a closed door, a scream of pain and horror such as I have never heard since. The door opened, and the researcher poked out her head and told me to run and make a hot drink for the young man sitting with her. She had just given him the news that in retaliation for his own outspokenness against his country"s regime, his mother had been seized and executed. </font></p><p><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">Every day of my working week in my early 20s I was reminded how incredibly fortunate I was, to live in a country with a democratically elected government, where legal representation and a public trial were the rights of everyone. </font></p><p><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">Every day, I saw more evidence about the evils humankind will inflict on their fellow humans, to gain or maintain power. I began to have nightmares, literal nightmares, about some of the things I saw, heard and read. </font></p><p><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">And yet I also learned more about human goodness at Amnesty International than I had ever known before. <br><br>Amnesty mobilizes thousands of people who have never been tortured or imprisoned for their beliefs to act on behalf of those who have. The power of human empathy, leading to collective action, saves lives, and frees prisoners. Ordinary people, whose personal well-being and security are assured, join together in huge numbers to save people they do not know, and will never meet. My small participation in that process was one of the most humbling and inspiring experiences of my life. </font></p><p><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">Unlike any other creature on this planet, humans can learn and understand, without having experienced. They can think themselves into other people"s minds, imagine themselves into other people"s places. </font></p><p><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">Of course, this is a power, like my brand of fictional magic, that is morally neutral. One might use such an ability to manipulate, or control, just as much as to understand or sympathize. </font></p><p><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">And many prefer not to exercise their imaginations at all. They choose to remain comfortably within the bounds of their own experience, never troubling to wonder how it would feel to have been born other than they are. They can refuse to hear screams or to peer inside cages; they can close their minds and hearts to any suffering that does not touch them personally; they can refuse to know. </font></p><p><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">I might be tempted to envy people who can live that way, except that I do not think they have any fewer nightmares than I do. Choosing to live in narrow spaces can lead to a form of mental agoraphobia, and that brings its own terrors. I think the willfully unimaginative see more monsters. They are often more afraid. </font></p><p><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">What is more, those who choose not to empathize may enable real monsters. For without ever committing an act of outright evil ourselves, we collude with it, through our own apathy.<br></font></p><br><div><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">One of the many things I learned at the end of that Classics corridor down which I ventured at the age of 18, in search of something I could not then define, was this, written by the Greek author Plutarch: <em>What we achieve inwardly will change outer reality. </em></font></div><br><p><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">That is an astonishing statement and yet proven a thousand times every day of our lives. It expresses, in part, our inescapable connection with the outside world, the fact that we touch other people"s lives simply by existing. </font></p><p><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">But how much more are you, Harvard graduates of 2008, likely to touch other people"s lives? Your intelligence, your capacity for hard work, the education you have earned and received, give you unique status, and unique responsibilities. Even your nationality sets you apart. The great<br>majority of you belong to the world"s only remaining superpower. The<br>way you vote, the way you live, the way you protest, the pressure you<br>bring to bear on your government, has an impact way beyond your<br>borders. That is your privilege, and your burden. </font></p><p><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">If you choose to use your status and influence to raise your voice on behalf of those who have no voice; if you choose to identify not only with the powerful, but with the powerless; if you retain the ability to imagine yourself into the lives of those who do not have your advantages, then it will not only be your proud families who celebrate your existence, but thousands and millions of people whose reality you have helped transform for the better. We do not need magic to change the world, we carry all the power we need inside ourselves already: we have the power to imagine better. </font></p><p><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">I am nearly finished. I have one last hope for you, which is something that I already had at 21. The friends with whom I sat on graduation day have been my friends for life. They are my children"s godparents, the people to whom I"ve been able to turn in times of trouble, friends who have been kind enough not to sue me when I"ve used their names for Death Eaters. At our graduation we were bound by enormous affection, by our shared experience of a time that could never come again, and, of course, by the knowledge that we held certain photographic evidence that would be exceptionally valuable if any of us ran for Prime Minister. </font></p><p><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">So today, I can wish you nothing better than similar friendships. And tomorrow, I hope that even if you remember not a single word of mine, you remember those of Seneca, another of those old Romans I met when I fled down the Classics corridor, in retreat from career ladders, in search of ancient wisdom:  </font></p><p><font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif"><i>As is a tale, so is life: not how long it is, but how good it is, is what matters.</i> <br><br>I wish you all very good lives. <br><br>Thank you very much. <br><br><br><b>Copyright of J.K. Rowling, June 2008</b><br></font></p><br><div><br><font face="Courier New, Courier, mono">View the video of her speech here -  </font><a href="http://youtube.com/watch?v=L445BmUEXH4" target="_blank"><font face="Courier New, Courier, mono">Part 1</font></a><font face="Courier New, Courier, mono">   </font><a href="http://youtube.com/watch?v=9kh_tSiqL1U" target="_blank"><font face="Courier New, Courier, mono">Part 2</font></a><font face="Courier New, Courier, mono">  <a href="" target="_blank">Part 3</a></font><br><br><br></div><BR>]]></description><pubDate>Tue, 15 Jul 2008 04:38:40 +0530</pubDate><link>http://blackswan.rediffiland.com/blogs/2008/07/15/The-Fringe-Benefits-of-Failure-and-the.html</link></item><item><title>Longing .... 2</title><description><![CDATA[<BR><br><br><br><font style="color: rgb(153, 0, 0);" size="2"><span style="font-family: Verdana,Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;">A long time ago, when I was still a teenager, I was reading a D H Lawrence book ("Sons and lovers", I think it was), in which the author describes a scene where this young man deeply in love with a young woman, serenades her every night by playing the violin and singing under her window. His song is filled with love and longing, because, unfortunately for him, she does not return his affection. Reading it, I somehow couldn"t relate to that emotion, since I had then not yet fallen in love :) I thought about it for many days and then forgot about it, until months later, on Doordarshan (this was before the multitude of channels took away the magic :)) I watched this black-and-white song for the first time. I have not heard a song since that conveyed the feeling of longing with such an intensity that I immediately understood the emotion of the young man in the book. (Of course, the performance by the lead actress helped too, longing written on every line of her face and body.)</span><br style="font-family: Verdana,Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;"><br style="font-family: Verdana,Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: Verdana,Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;">Well, now I"m nearly old and much wizened and longing has assailed my heart many times, so I decided to write a post about it :) We long for so many things, the loving to be loved by one person, or many, to be accepted by a group. To be in a certain place, maybe filled with memorable happy memories, or even go back to the innocence of childhood. We long for career fulfillment, meaning in life, freedom from illness, we thirst for more and more knowledge, for adventure. Notice how all of them are experiences.</span><br style="font-family: Verdana,Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;"><br style="font-family: Verdana,Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: Verdana,Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;">When one longing is fulfilled we move to the next one, it appears that our lives are spent in the fulfillment of one unfulfilled longing after another. If not anything, we long for freedom from longing. It seems to me that longing is hard-wired into our system. I wonder if all these longings are a mask for the one longing we fail to acknowledge - the longing to be one with our Source. I wonder, if all those other longings are fulfilled, will we still say, like Radha says to Krishna in Geeta Dutt"s haunting voice, "main hoon antar ghat tak pyaasi.."</span><br style="font-family: Verdana,Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;"><br style="font-family: Verdana,Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: Verdana,Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;">I dedicate this song to Kush babu, our young erudite friend, only he will understand the reasons .. :)</span><br style="font-family: Verdana,Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;"><br style="font-family: Verdana,Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: Verdana,Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;">So here it is, the song that introduced me to longing ..</span><br style="font-family: Verdana,Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;"><br style="font-family: Verdana,Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;"><br style="font-family: Verdana,Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;"><a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6Y_Cd9KN67E" target="_blank">Click here to view the song</a><br><br style="font-family: Verdana,Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;"></font><br><br><br><br><br><BR>]]></description><pubDate>Wed, 09 Jul 2008 16:13:50 +0530</pubDate><link>http://blackswan.rediffiland.com/blogs/2008/07/09/Longing-2-1.html</link></item><item><title>War - a dialogue</title><description><![CDATA[<BR><p><span style="font-size: 9pt; font-family: Verdana;" lang="EN-US">Sarath Chandra and I have been having a dialogue on war, among other things, which you will see started with something else altogether, and with his permission I reproduce our GB conversation so that my other friends can join in and share their viewpoints and that way both Sarath and I can learn from it . <br>Somewhere along the way I started to think as to why I"m having this discussion at all, since my life has not been affected directly by war. But then I realised that wars are started and carried out by individuals like me and if I can better understand the underlying reasons for the apparent necessity of war, I may better be able to understand myself. And also, there is a lot of new-age teaching out there that tells us that thought has tremendous power, and I figured if sufficient people think peace, we just might be able to phase out war.<br><br>Disclaimer : If you"re looking for some light reading, please don"t read further. This is all serious stuff and I wish now I had interjected some light humour, but since I don"t know Sarath very well, I wasn"t too sure <span style="font-size: 9pt; font-family: Wingdings;" mso-bidi-font-family:="" times="" new="" roman="" ;="" mso-fareast-language:="" en-gb;="" mso-bidi-language:="" ar-sa="" lang="EN-US"><span style="">J</span></span><br><br>Sarath, I hope you like green </span><span style="font-size: 9pt; font-family: Wingdings;" lang="EN-US"><span style="">J</span></span><span style="font-size: 9pt; font-family: Verdana;" lang="EN-US"><br><br><br><b style=""><i><span style="color: rgb(51, 51, 153);">JJ - 26th June</span></i></b></span><span style="font-size: 9pt; color: rgb(51, 51, 153); font-family: Verdana;"> <br></span><i><span style="font-size: 9pt; color: rgb(51, 51, 153); font-family: Verdana;" lang="EN-NZ">Thanks for looking over my posts, Sarath, but you wouldn"t find anything cerebral there :))) I tend to get cerebral only when the need arises. At other times I tend to repose in a contemplative place. I"m think I"m basically a right-brain thinker. I read an interesting article on <u>www.wired.com</u> the other day about how the "Logical Age" is giving way to the "Conceptual Age" because humans are realising that logic and reasoning is something that can be outsourced soon to thinking robots and that now we are feeling the need to explore the hiterto neglected regions of our right-brain. If that happens we might even get to a place where we realise that war and violence is so futile , but on the other hand we might also get creative in our violence and then our robots to churn out weapons by the millions :(</span></i><span style="font-size: 9pt; font-family: Verdana;" lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;"><b style=""><span style="font-size: 9pt; color: green; font-family: Verdana;">SC  26<sup>th</sup> June<o:p></o:p></span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt; color: rgb(0, 102, 0);"><span style="font-size: 9pt; font-family: Verdana;">Regarding your comment on my GB, <br><br>Once we create "thinking" robots which must include learning, there is no way intelligence will die anymore. I think mankind has long since realized war and violence are futile. The war that is going on in various parts of the world is an economic necessity for the weapon"s manufacturers, defense researchers, armies etc. Once war ends the societies have to support a huge number of people in non-war activities. I don"t think people realize this. This has to be strealined process. Mankind cannot stop warring one fine morning. The poverty caused by that will rival a lot of wars and is longer lasting. We have to increase economic activity and simultaneously reduce wars gradually as we absorb members formerly supported by wars. One can point out so many deaths and suffering due to war and all; but unless we realize this reality that ain"t going anywhere :(<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt; color: rgb(0, 102, 0);"><span style="font-size: 9pt; font-family: Verdana;"><o:p> </o:p></span></p><p><b style=""><i><span style="font-size: 9pt; color: rgb(51, 51, 153); font-family: Verdana;" lang="EN-US">JJ - 26th June</span></i></b><span style="font-size: 9pt; color: rgb(51, 51, 153); font-family: Verdana;"> <br></span><i><span style="font-size: 9pt; color: rgb(51, 51, 153); font-family: Verdana;" lang="EN-NZ">Sarath, nowhere did I imply that with the outsourcing of logical tasks are humans beings going to stop thinking. I only meant that we might shift to more right-brain thinking. It is true that the manufacturers of weapons need to keep war alive. But looking at the deeper issues, it"s the ego of mankind that keeps wars and violence alive. And in any case wars are no going to end in a day, so no worries about the displaced labour force. When computers first came on the scene the same argument provoked a lot of fear, but no widespread hunger or death took place.</span></i><span style="font-size: 9pt; color: rgb(51, 51, 153); font-family: Verdana;"><o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;"><b style=""><span style="font-size: 9pt; color: green; font-family: Verdana;">SC  26<sup>th</sup> June</span></b><span style="font-size: 9pt; color: green; font-family: Verdana;"><br>Well, Jolly, my sentences are getting disconnected. Sorry about that. When I said "intelligence won"t die after the emergence of thinking robots", I meant even if we (humans) happen to die in a nuclear holocaust or comet impact, intelligence will likely survive in the form of those inorganic machines. That part is just a misunderstanding and I do agree with your first couple of sentences. <br><br>Moving on to the war issues, I think, it is erroneous to compare it with the software boom. The emergence of computer led to the fallacious arguments you mentioned. The problem was the issue was examined only on the surface (I may be doing that in the war scenario; but that is a different issue). Computers effectively could replace a lot of manual labor. It decreased labor costs resulting in lower product costs, more time, bigger companies as companies started catering to greater demand; the economic activity a company can handle snowballed<br><br>The domino effect of a computer finally providing greater net economic activity cannot be escaped if we follow the law of causality patiently. I never misunderstood this phenomena since the introduction of computers (but this is irrelevant). In short, computers did not destroy an existing economic activity; they just provided a much more economically efficient way to do it. The net economic result is positive. <br><br>But when we stop wars, we are destroying an economic activity. These people have to be absorbed in other sectors. It is not like replacing 10 accountants with 1 accountant and a computer. It is like no accounting activity (department) anymore. Besides wars also have the important role of preparing us for possible more dangerous extra terrestrial threats. We would be extinct in the face of the merest challenge, if we don"t know how to face up to an adverse situation or challenge from another species.<br><br>This is not a justification of war; but unless we recognize the issue in all aspects we will not find an efficient way to minimize wars while retaining its advantages. It is an open secret that many wars are encouraged because of economic reasons. For example, the Taliban emerged because the Afghans did not know what to do with their weapons after the soviet war. The market was kept alive by continuing their militant activities by spreading to <st1:city w:st="on">Kashmir</st1:city>, <st1:country-region w:st="on">Pakistan</st1:country-region>, and turning their eye to the <st1:country-region w:st="on">US</st1:country-region> and <st1:place w:st="on">Europe</st1:place>. My contention is only that if we want to stop the war a lot of thought should also be given to the economic side of it; flashing the images of ravages of war appeal to only the emotional side of us. And most of us have no direct financial stake in these wars. In effect, we are fighting for the funds to be allocated to us civilians, while the armies/other outfits want the funds for themselves.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p><b style=""><i><span style="font-size: 9pt; color: rgb(51, 51, 153); font-family: Verdana;" lang="EN-US">JJ - 27th June</span></i></b><span style="font-size: 9pt; color: rgb(51, 51, 153); font-family: Verdana;"> <br></span><i><span style="font-size: 9pt; color: rgb(51, 51, 153); font-family: Verdana;" lang="EN-NZ">First of all Sarath, I don"t think the entire war machinery all over the world is going to close down one fine day and millions of workers going to enter the workforce suddenly. If at all such a shift towards no-war happens it"s going to be gradual. And if well managed the economic aftermath can be handled as well. Case in point - <st1:country-region w:st="on"><st1:place w:st="on">Japan</st1:place></st1:country-region>. After WW2, when they dismantled their war apparatus their economy didn"t fall over. It survived and prospered. You have to remember that the defence industry eats up a lot of money from govt treasuries on one side as well. And I"m no expert in this matter, but I think war is something we can phase out gradually once mankind realises how futile it is. All it requires is political will. And keeping the arms industry in business is not the ONLY reason that wars take place. </span></i><span style="font-size: 9pt; color: rgb(51, 51, 153); font-family: Verdana;"><o:p></o:p></span></p><p><i><span style="font-size: 9pt; color: rgb(51, 51, 153); font-family: Verdana;" lang="EN-NZ">And that we need weaponry to shield off aliens is being over-confident of our own devices. If those aliens are capable of inter-galactic travel, it stands to reason that their weaponry will be far more advanced than ours. But these are all skimming the surface issues, I still think that it is the human ego that keeps wars (on micro and macro level) and violence alive. Looking for economic and security reasons to keep the war fires burning is like treating the symptoms rather than the cause.</span></i><span style="font-size: 9pt; color: rgb(51, 51, 153); font-family: Verdana;"><o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0cm 0cm 12pt;"><b style=""><span style="font-size: 9pt; color: green; font-family: Verdana;">SC  28<sup>th</sup> June</span></b><span style="font-size: 9pt; color: green; font-family: Verdana;"><br>Jolly, this is what I could come up with <span style="font-size: 9pt; font-family: Wingdings;" mso-bidi-font-family:="" times="" new="" roman="" ;="" mso-fareast-language:="" en-gb;="" mso-bidi-language:="" ar-sa="" lang="EN-US"><span style=""><font color="#000000">J</font></span></span> A bit jumbled, but couldn"t do better with the presentation. Sorry. <br><br>Jolly, I hope you understand I am not supporting wars. I only think whenever we want something it is not sufficient to look at it from one point of view and declare if everybody does what we think should be done, then the world will be perfect. The problem is everybody else thinks the same way as we do. <br><br>"Political will" is a word. The question is what does the word contain? Imagine being a head of a state with the political will to stop the war and decide what you would do with that word? How would you phase out war? Imagine being Indian head of state and solving <st1:country-region w:st="on"><st1:place w:st="on">India</st1:place></st1:country-region>"s problems on the North eastern border, Northern border, and western border with that will. What is the road map?<br><br>Anyway, I personally don"t think any problem can be solved without understanding all aspects that run it clearly. A war has two major driving forces; the dispute and the economy of weapons and personnel. All of us know only the dispute and we say "Why are they fighting? Can"t they solve it peacefully?" You can say fighting is not an answer; they can sit quietly and think about it. What if one party sits quietly and the other overpowers them? How would you, the advice giver ensure justice is done in this case? Another war or ask for maintaining status quo like the UN did in case of <st1:place w:st="on">Kashmir</st1:place> and dragging the problem along? The other force is the strong flow of money that drives it. It can be your personal view that we have no chance against an intergalactic race; but not many around the earth would appreciate we giving in without a fight in case of external threats;<br><br>Why? what would be Indians" general reaction if we neglect our defence readiness and get attacked by a superior army like <st1:country-region w:st="on"><st1:place w:st="on">Russia</st1:place></st1:country-region> or some European army? Say we don"t have a chance and die? <br><br>An example is playing right in front of our eyes in the form of <st1:country-region w:st="on"><st1:place w:st="on">Tibet</st1:place></st1:country-region> as to what might happen to a society that neglects its defence. It depends on the "sympathy" of international community for whatever little demands it has. And every country in the world knows there is little in the form of gain or loss by taking a stand keeping <st1:country-region w:st="on"><st1:place w:st="on">Tibet</st1:place></st1:country-region> in mind. It is virtually irrelevant. They make their stand vis-a-vis their relationship with <st1:country-region w:st="on"><st1:place w:st="on">China</st1:place></st1:country-region>. War has a role in societies; it is certainly irrelevant at many places; it has a very strong economic angle to it; it is virtually impossible to dissolve armies around the world; defense research is not exclusive from many other socially relevant research or scientific research; they are by products of the same research.<br><br>Just saying everybody should stop it will not get it done. We have to convince all parties concerned of our reasoning. Unless we understand all parties (disputing parties and economic wings), I don"t think we have any hope, of developing such a reasoning. Stopping wars (or having the political will for it) is a goal; not a process. A prospective solution is developing the process towards that goal; not stating the goal.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p><b style=""><i><span style="font-size: 9pt; color: rgb(51, 51, 153); font-family: Verdana;" lang="EN-US">JJ - 29th June</span></i></b><span style="font-size: 9pt; color: rgb(51, 51, 153); font-family: Verdana;" lang="EN-US"> </span><span style="font-size: 9pt; color: rgb(51, 51, 153); font-family: Verdana;"><br></span><i><span style="font-size: 9pt; color: rgb(51, 51, 153); font-family: Verdana;" lang="EN-NZ">Sarath, I agree entirely that one must understand all aspects of war. But what I am advocating is that we look a bit deeper than that war is caused by dispute / economic reasons. It is said that the first war took place when Cain killed Abel (envy, or wanting to possess what the other person had). On another note, it's said that war started when the first fence was put up (claiming land that belonged to nature as one's own). So, it appears as if war is almost as old as humankind itself. To paraphrase it my way :))) war is caused by ego (dispute) or greed (economic reasons). So I believe it's going to be around for a long time, unless we take the shorter route and nuke ourselves or take the longer route and rise above our ego and greed. I think it will take an event very close to the annihilation of the human race for humans to finally wake up and realise the futility of war.<br></span></i><span style="font-size: 9pt; color: rgb(51, 51, 153); font-family: Verdana;"><br></span><i><span style="font-size: 9pt; color: rgb(51, 51, 153); font-family: Verdana;" lang="EN-NZ">Since you've brought up the issue of <st1:country-region w:st="on">Tibet</st1:country-region> and countries in states of non-preparedness, why is it that <st1:country-region w:st="on">China</st1:country-region> is not attacking <st1:country-region w:st="on"><st1:place w:st="on">Japan</st1:place></st1:country-region>? Wouldn't it stand to gain more? Why is no one coming to <st1:country-region w:st="on"><st1:place w:st="on">Tibet</st1:place></st1:country-region>'s rescue? Why did the <st1:country-region w:st="on">US</st1:country-region> come to <st1:country-region w:st="on">Kuwait</st1:country-region>'s rescue when <st1:country-region w:st="on"><st1:place w:st="on">Iraq</st1:place></st1:country-region> attacked it? Political will is not enough, even a world governing body like the UN cannot stop wars let alone eradicate it. Sorry, my thoughts are a bit jumbled today :) must be Sunday indolence :)))</span></i><span style="font-size: 9pt; color: rgb(51, 51, 153); font-family: Verdana;"><o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;"><span style="font-size: 9pt; font-family: Verdana;"><o:p> </o:p></span></p><p><b style=""><span style="font-size: 9pt; color: green; font-family: Verdana;" lang="EN-US">SC</span></b><b style=""><span style="font-size: 9pt; color: green; font-family: Verdana;" lang="EN-US"> </span></b><b style=""><span style="font-size: 9pt; color: green; font-family: Verdana;"> 29<sup>th</sup> June</span></b><span style="font-size: 9pt; color: green; font-family: Verdana;"><br>Am enjoying the war discussion. Jumbled or not, you make some pertinent points. Anyway, I will ignore your second GB entry; ; those are questions on diplomacy, foreign policies based on self-interest. The first one, though a very interesting analysis, I disagree with. War is not as old as mankind; it is as old as life itself. When facing limited resources, all species settled their disputes by physical combats. The (physically) stronger (or agile etc) always prevailed. Any analysis of how a species settles disagreements will show man right on top; we use force much less frequently is settling disputes than any species that was ever here on earth (to our knowledge). Of course, it is a different matter that some species may never had to fight as they never faced a situation of limited resources<o:p></o:p></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 9pt; color: green; font-family: Verdana;">An instinct for self-preservation is primal in all life. Still, mankind evolved a way to settle a major portion of its disputes without using force and relegated war to a section of society. This is the reason for mankind"s success as a species, in my opinion. And this came about, because mankind defined private property rights, and the concepts of rights and freedom. As you said, it may look like ego and greed are the driving forces of war. But from another point of view, all war is over inadequately defined property rights. It is mostly over properties over which no single person has the right to take any decision. The only way I foresee the end of wars is to wait for the end of nation-states (which is already underway due to globalization and internet). Once national boundaries dissolve and become irrelevant, and properties on boundaries are privatized, we evolve as a single global community. Then we just have to find a way to train ourselves against external threats :)<o:p></o:p></span></p><p><span style="font-size: 9pt; color: green; font-family: Verdana;">BTW, please let me know if you really want to talk about your second entry on my GB. I have some ideas and information, and we can follow up and educate each other as we discuss (or if you know everything :)) you can just tell me) :)<o:p></o:p></span></p><p><b style=""><i><span style="font-size: 9pt; color: rgb(51, 51, 153); font-family: Verdana;" lang="EN-NZ">JJ - 30th June</span></i></b><span style="font-size: 9pt; color: rgb(51, 51, 153); font-family: Verdana;"> <br></span><i><span style="font-size: 9pt; color: rgb(51, 51, 153); font-family: Verdana;" lang="EN-NZ">Sarath, one only need to watch a few episodes of Nat Geo / Discovery to find out that animals are warring on a daily basis, for them it is a matter of survival. We are the superior species, aren"t we? Endowed with intelligence of a higher order. So it stands to reason that we will settle our disputes more amicably. If globalisation and the blurring of boundaries will eliminate war, what could be better for mankind. But, I think, in the 20th century itself, more people were killed in wars and related events than many centuries put together. Look at the Indian subcontinent, <st1:country-region w:st="on"><st1:place w:st="on">India</st1:place></st1:country-region> got split into three different countries and their differences are getting more entrenched by the day. And living in the <st1:country-region w:st="on"><st1:place w:st="on">US</st1:place></st1:country-region>, would you not agree, that the Americans are getting more neurotic about security, national boundaries and foreigners (esp of a certain faith) after 9/11? With the arrival of terrorism, war has taken a more insidious form, war now no longer means war between countries.</span></i><span style="font-size: 9pt; color: rgb(51, 51, 153); font-family: Verdana;"><o:p></o:p></span></p><p><i><span style="font-size: 9pt; color: rgb(51, 51, 153); font-family: Verdana;" lang="EN-NZ">It is true that wars sometimes happen as the result of fighting over scarce resources, but it is also said that if all countries would disarm and release their defence budgets, it would end global hunger. So resources are not exactly scarce, it"s just that it is in the greed of some parties to corner most of the resources and keep the scarcity alive. That is more to do with power than mere basic survival. Humans unlike animals, are not satisfied with what we"ve got, we must constantly be increasing our sphere of influence. With a mindset like that I don't have much hope in wars being eliminated just by regulating property rights. On the other hand, I think if all the world will reach a common level of economic prosperity (like <st1:place w:st="on">Europe</st1:place> has :)) then eliminating war would be more probable. But like I said before, it is in the best interests to keep others poor, weak and vulnerable. Hence, war continues.</span></i><span style="font-size: 9pt; color: rgb(51, 51, 153); font-family: Verdana;"><o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;"><b style=""><span style="font-size: 9pt; color: green; font-family: Verdana;">SC  30<sup>th</sup> June<o:p></o:p></span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;"><span style="font-size: 9pt; color: green; font-family: Verdana;">Now here goes another treatise :)) <br><br><st1:place w:st="on"><st1:city w:st="on">Superior</st1:city></st1:place>? Endowed? - I"d say we evolved and are evolving. We used to do the same as what the animals are doing now. We chose to learn and are still learning. No animal can stop fighting suddenly. Not long ago (on geological time scales) we had no chance against most wild animals and could have been extinct (like the Neanderthals were). I"ll give mankind a lot of credit for being resilient enough to find a way to survive and flourish against overwhelming odds where we reached a point that we have to take care of the same species that even now would not hesitate to eat us alive if possible. Besides, just because somebody is intelligent, disputes won"t be resolved amicably. The intelligence should result in a method, and that method, which separated mankind from the animal kingdom, is private property rights.<br><br>On more people being killed in 20th century than many centuries put together - Basically wars have always been part of human history. Accurate statistics are recorded now. It wasn"t so even 3-4 centuries ago. If we take the proportion of people participating in war, it has decreased drastically in the last 2 centuries. Besides, now even a single man can kill 100s with strategically placed bombs while earlier even the man with cruellest intentions can kill only one at a time and only when physically proximate. If 10 out of a total population of 100 in a village are poor in 2000, and the same village evolved to 100000 in 2010, but now we have 20 poor; saying the number of poor has doubled in 10 years maybe accurate, but a mightily misleading picture. In the background of exponentially increased global population and the firepower we have in a single individual, it is easy to see that mankind has actually improved (and this is a gross understatement) in time.<br><br>On neurosis about "a certain faith" - I"d prefer that to more bomb blasts. In fact I wrote a couple of articles on Islam (I have an index - 2nd from bottom on my current page); I think it is the last major challenge of mankind. This is not to say I am against muslims; but as long as Islam does not separate itself from governance like all other "faiths" did, I am fighting it. In fact, I don"t think it can be qualified as "faith" or "religion" in the background of death sentences for criticising Quran/Muhammad in a dozen countries (and extensively used to frame laws in a lot of the remaining 40 Islamic majority countries).<br><br>On Money - I"ll be typing a lot of what I said elsewhere if I go in detail. Can you please read "Understand Money, Poverty, and prosperity" on my page before going further? In the background of that, a 100 dollars in the center of <st1:city w:st="on">Manhattan</st1:city> is not of the same value as in <st1:place w:st="on">Africa</st1:place> or the tropical forests. The 100 dollars are pieces of paper; they have no intrinsic value; nobody can eat them or live in them. The value is proportional to the amount of output a society has. Stopping all war activities and pumping out all that money into the poor regions will not eliminate hunger. It will only increase inflation. If money were to solve all problems all a country has to do is print out more notes and distribute among the poor.<br><br>These "solutions" that say the rich should "share" their wealth with the poor and the rich countries exploited the poor countries to become rich come from a basic lack of understand of money (especially currency, which we started thinking of as having intrinsic value). And of course, it feels good to blame somebody else for all the problems an individual is facing and with the number of poor being what it is, one would get the numbers to support. In short, poverty is a result of lack of economic activity, not a lack of some pieces of paper. And each country has itself to blame for not being able to device efficient trading systems, if poor. In fact, the world over, the richest are not those with the greatest natural resources, but with the most efficient trading systems.<br><br>And if humans were satisfied with what they"ve got, they would not have separated (or even survived) themselves from animals in the first place. We came from animals and we have eliminated a lot of intra-species force; saying going back to being like animals (as against a desire for more; greed if used negatively, ambition if used positively) will eliminate war, I don"t think, cuts much ice.</span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;"><br></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;"><b style=""><i><span style="font-size: 9pt; color: rgb(51, 51, 153); font-family: Verdana;" lang="EN-NZ">JJ - 2nd July</span></i></b><span style="font-size: 9pt; color: rgb(51, 51, 153); font-family: Verdana;"> <br></span><i><span style="font-size: 9pt; color: rgb(51, 51, 153); font-family: Verdana;" lang="EN-NZ">That we have managed to avoid being wiped out at the jaws of wild animals and have flourished is in itself a sign of our superior mental prowess. But the point I'm trying to make is that humans and animals war for different reasons. They war for basic survival, but we do on account of our ego and greed (or for the survival of these). Oh, I'm beginning to be repetitive now :( Just because we are intelligent doesn't mean that disputes will be solved amicably. But because we are intelligent we can find out the causes of war, eliminate them and therefore learn to live in peace. :) <br><br>I don't know the exact numbers that were killed in the 20th century alone in wars, but I was also speaking in relative terms not in absolutes. Look at all the wars waged in the 20th century and the numbers killed and affected. Mind boggling !!! The argument that less people are now participating in wars now is of little comfort, considering the fact that weapons nowadays can wipe out entire cities and affect populations for generations (Hiroshima and Nagasaki). While in the past a single soldier could only cause limited damage in face-face combat and that too only to the others fighting in the war, in present times weapons can cause not only death but undocumented suffering and hardship to living civilians (eg, sanctions against Iraq). So let's not go into ratios :)<br><br>Sarath, I wasn't suggesting that the entire war-machinery be dismantled and the proceeds distributed among the poor nations. That's too simplistic a way of looking at things, and is never going to work anyway. <br><br>The line between greed and ambition is thin in any case. And a lot of people try to disguise their greed by calling it ambition. To do your best, to give your best, to realise your full potential, to stretch your boundaries, that is ambition, and that is what makes us stand out from the animals. To do the same but by usurping what is not yours, and to do so willfully and to the detriment of the other person, is greed and that is what is leading to wars.</span></i></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;"><i><span style="font-size: 9pt; color: rgb(51, 51, 153); font-family: Verdana;" lang="EN-NZ"></span></i><br><span style="font-size: 9pt; color: green; font-family: Verdana;"> <o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;"><span style="font-size: 9pt; font-family: Verdana;"><o:p> </o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;"><span style="font-size: 9pt; font-family: Verdana;"><o:p> </o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;"><span style="font-size: 9pt; font-family: Verdana;">Please add your own thoughts, folks </span><span style="font-size: 9pt; font-family: Wingdings;"><span style="">J</span></span><span style="font-size: 9pt; font-family: Verdana;"><o:p></o:p></span></p><br><BR>]]></description><pubDate>Wed, 02 Jul 2008 06:26:28 +0530</pubDate><link>http://blackswan.rediffiland.com/blogs/2008/07/02/War-a-dialogue-1.html</link></item><item><title>The third choice</title><description><![CDATA[<BR><font face="Verdana" size="2">"It takes more courage to die than to live", he thinks woefully as he squats beside the tracks, blinking to keep out the already hot, late morning sunlight. He had failed again in his third attempt at flinging himself in front of a train. The first time his courage had abandoned him completely<wbr> and he had moved away to safety just as the mammoth was upon him. He had to wait for about half-an-hour before the next train came thundering down the tracks, but he was better prepared this time. He had inured himself against the shock by closing his eyes, but the train had given such a sudden and loud toot that he had jumped out of the way in plain fright. <br><br>"What a coward I am" he had berated himself as he waited through the advancing morning for the next train, which took even longer to arrive. No more false starts this time, he said to himself as he wedged his feet into the tracks on both sides and stood squarely staring at the brown engine. But he was not prepared for the look of total terror on the driver"s face. The poor man was standing up in his cubicle, leaning forward, looking horror-stricken and it seemed that it was him facing death, not the man on the tracks. In that last second that separated him from death, some impulse of kindness or perhaps compassion had moved him to hurtle his body out of the way. And so, here he was, sitting beside the tracks alive, his mind dazed by defeat, his heart gone numb and his body assailed by hunger and thirst. "If only there was a third choice" he thinks wearily, "I do not want to go back to my life and it seems I cannot die". <br><br><i>He had got out of bed early that morning not having slept the whole night, his mind numb with sleep but still holding on to the one clear thought that he must kill himself that day. He had tidied up the little house that he rented on the outskirts of town, as a kind gesture towards his kindly landlord, who had unhesitatingly rented him the house a few days earlier even though he was a perfect stranger and a newcomer in town. He had made himself a cup of tea purely out of habit, but had not eaten anything. What was the need anyway, he was going to die. Then knowing that a long-distance train was due soon, since the house was close to the tracks, he had latched the door from outside and walked for some distance till he had left the town behind him and the tracks ran through marshes on both sides. And had waited for that first train.</i>  <br><br>As the day advances, the sun beats down relentlessly on him, glinting off the tracks and boring into his eyes. There in the lonely wilderness, the vapour that simmers and curls up from the hot steel seems like the ghosts from his past dancing in his hazy consciousness. "The third choice, the third choice" his brain hisses as sleep grapples with anguish in its fevered spaces. Finally, just when it seems that his demons have overpowered him and possessed his soul, he passes out.  <br><br>He wakes up to whiteness, white walls and a whiter ceiling. The idea of heaven seems likely, until he feels the most indescribable thirst assail his throat. The notion of hell is just forming in his mind when his eyes fall on the upside-down bottle attached to a tube plugged into his arm.  <br><br>"Ah!" a voice says from the other side of the bed, "you"ve woken up at last". A dusky young girl in a white sari is looking down at him in mock reproach. "Do you know how long you"ve been asleep?" He shakes his head, which is already throbbing mightily. "For 24 hours", she says with a flourish. "Ok then, can you tell us what your name is and where you are from." He shakes his head again, even though it hurts to do so, because he"s sure no words will come from his parched throat. "Come on now, give it a try," a briskness has come into her manner and she waits with her pen poised over a pad. He passes his tongue over his dry lips wanting to give it a try, and she taking the cue gets him a glass of water. Finally after many efforts, all he can manage to say is "I don"t remember". <br><br>"Hey Bhagawan!" she says a look of alarm coming into her eyes. She puts the pen and pad down and hastens from the room. Thereafter, he has a steady stream of visitors, some infrequent like the policeman who comes to take his statement and his photo, and some regular like Tara the nurse, and people in white coats who ask him questions. To all of which he has only one answer, "I don"t remember". Finally, after many days of examining him and the evidence, they reach the conclusion that since there is no distinguishable injury or illness, the damage done to him could possible be psychological. He is declared an amnesiac, and it is decided that he be moved to the psychiatric hospital at the earliest possible opportunity. <br><br>Meanwhile, on the other side of town, Shabana scans the local newspaper. It has been two months to the day since her husband Shoaib went missing, not having arrived home one day from his tailoring shop. The next day, his best friend and next-door neighbour Javed had urged her to report him missing to the police, but some inexplicable hope had held her back. Over the weeks, her restless, probing eyes had searched for his face among the faces of strangers in busy crowds, in marketplaces, at the dargah, with fading hope. The gnawing fear in her heart had risen to such a pitch that she had come close to hysteria, but some indomitable hope had steadied her mind and allayed her fears, and so she searches the yellowed pages, newsprint smudging her fingers, hope rising and falling with each turn of the page. <br><br>Then to her complete astonishment and delight, she sees him looking back at her from a tiny photo deep inside the newspaper. He looks haggard and tired, and his cheeks seem to have shrunk a bit. The newspaper informs her that he has lost his memory. They are looking for his next of kin or for any information about his background. She flings the newspaper to the ground, puts on her burqa, grabbing her cloth bag on her way out. <br><br>He is pondering the blankness of his mind, looking for clues behind closed eyelids when he feels a tightening and a weight around his feet. All he can see when he opens his eyes is a burqa that is kneeling on the floor, has draped its arms around his feet, and has buried the burqa-less part into the sheet. "Shoaib! Shoaib!" she says in muffled sobs over and over again, and finally raises her tear-streaked face and hands heavenward and cries "Hey Allah!" He takes this chance and retreats his feet, and Tara hearing the noise bustles into the room. She stands there for a moment taking in the scene and lays a gentle hand on the woman"s shoulder "Who are you, bibi?" <br><br>"I"m his wife", she says getting to her feet assisted by Tara, "oh, I"ve been so frantic with worry since he went missing. Allah ka lakh lakh shukar hai! I"ve found him at last."  <br><br>"Can you come into the doctor"s room, you need to talk to him." <br><br>So after much deliberation and delay and signing of papers, he gets discharged and taken home, which is a tottering, old house in a bustling basti. The lanky, young lad whom he meets first regards him with a suspicion bordering on hostility. <br><br>"How dare you come back after abandoning us like that?" His voice on the verge of manhood, bristles with anger and hate. <br><br>"Come on Saif, he was not well, he has lost his memory, be nice, he"s your Abbu after all."  Shabana plays the nervous conciliator. <br><br>But the tension in the room is immediately diffused by the arrival of little Salma who bursts into the room like a ray of sunshine suddenly released, her face lit up with the brilliance of a thousand suns, her eyes sparking with the delight of having her Abbu back. And hanging on to his arm, besieges him with questions, "What did you get for me, Abbu, Ammi said you had gone to a faraway place, what did you see there Abbu? Did you miss us? Do you know how much Gudiya missed you. I prayed every night to Allah that he bring you back soon. Why did you not write to us, why did you not phone?"  And some inexplicable force unlatches the tightly shut doors of his heart, moves his hands and he gathers her up in his arms and clasps her to his chest, much to Shabana"s joy and Saif"s surprise. <br><br>Over the next few days, Shabana gently informs him that he is a tailor with his own tailoring shop and two assistants. That there is a lot of work piled up at the shop, and that she with some assistance had been able to clear off only the urgent work. She had invented the story that he had to rush to his village to look after his father suddenly taken ill and so could hold off for a while. But now she is willing to teach him the cutting and sewing skills that he had once taught her. <br><br>The daily namaaz poses a greater problem, so Javed shepherds him to the mosque everyday and standing in the last row imitating Javed"s actions, he makes peace with the Creator. <br><br>The greatest challenge, however, are the nights. Even he with his hazy memory realises that it would take him just one act of intimacy for Shabana to find out that he"s an impostor masquerading as her husband, so he circumvents that by going over to Javed"s house after dinner where they spend hours sitting under a foggy sky smoking cigarettes until Javed begins to nod into his chest. He then tiptoes into the bedroom and slips into bed taking the utmost care not to disturb a sleeping Shabana.<br><br>But his most luminous moments are the ones in which he finds little Salma, fondly called Gudiya, sitting up in his lap prattling on about the day"s events as if they were of national importance while he plays with the curls around her face and watches the light glinting off her eyes. And sometimes when she curls up and sleeps off on his chest, he feels the tenderest of love welling up within him and surrounding her with its protection. <br><br>Young Saif however remains aloof and suspicious. Little by little he bridges the gap, in tiny steps over sometimes smooth, otherwise rocky terrain. When he finds out that Saif is cricket-crazy, he buys him a cricket set complete with bat, ball, stumps, pads, cap and Saif is soon the envy of the teenage boy gang. They spend hours together watching cricket matches on TV, rooting for their favourite players, occasionally quarrelling vehemently, the argument always won in his favour when Gudiya on his lap declares with finality, "Abbu is right!" Shabana looks on with fond indulgence, her eyes shining, her face glowing with love at this her little family in their warm, safe home. <br><br>They develop a ritual for their Sunday evenings. The whole family pile into Javed"s auto and they take off to where their fancy takes them, the only rule being that they must go to some part of the city where they have never been before. Returning at night, having gorged on 'golgappas' or ice-creams, replete, happy and sleepy. <br><br>Late one evening he is interrupted in his measuring and cutting by a white-faced Javed, who informs him that Gudiya has not returned from school. Saif had gone home thinking that the little girl had left earlier with her friends. But on finding that she had not reached, he and Shabana had gone to school looking for her, where she had not been found, then to her friends' houses where she had not been found either. They search through the night, along the way registering a complaint at the police station. They search well through the next day, until finally late in the evening a far away police station reports that the mutilated body of a little girl had been found and ask them to come and identify the body. His mind is blank through the journey except for of a dull despair that somehow seems familiar. <br><br>At the police station they find a doll broken and post-mortemed beyond recognition. As he bends to sign the papers, the words "Rape and murder" jump out at him and grab him by his throat. In the blinding instant that follows, all thought and emotion are wiped out from within him, leaving just a furious rage that is high-voltage in its intensity, streaking across his body in large electrical flashes. His knees buckle and he staggers on his feet and it takes all of Javed"s persuasive powers to just get him back to his senses and sign the remaining papers. <br><br>The only thing that keeps him alive on the journey home is the rage that has now consumed him. He feels there is not one but two corpses in the vehicle and if it wasn"t for the pulsating fury, he would gladly have lain down beside the little body and willingly allowed himself to be buried with her. <br><br>The next day, after the last rites, it is announced that all the men are meeting in the Khan Saheb"s house. He walks in last with Javed beside him into a room already crackling with tension. The elders of the community are seated in the front and some men are squatting on the floor, but most are standing in various poses of anger and aggression. Some of the younger ones even have bottles and hockey sticks in their hands. <br><br>The voices that had lulled on his entry rise up around him once again. <br><br>"The guilty must be found and punished." <br><br>"Yes, if we leave it to the police it will take years." <br><br>"I think it is Mohan who did it."  <br><br>"Yes, people have seen him lurking around the school many times." <br><br>"They say he even buys the little kids candy." <br><br>"What business has he got in the school?" <br><br>"Maybe he took her away during the afternoon recess." <br><br>"Yes, I"m pretty sure it"s Mohan, even my daughter has complained." <br><br>"Yes, let"s go after Mohan, I know where to find him." <br><br>"Yes, Mohan is our man, let"s go.." <br><br>"Mohan, Mohan," voices rise up from his past, in anger, in pain. Images that he had long hidden in the corners of his subconscious mind slither into his brain in slow-motion sinuousness. "Mohan." was that plaintive voice his mother"s? "Mohan" the explosive rage must surely be his father"s. "Mohan." was all the clouded vision of his wraithlike wife could manage to whisper as the last breath had escaped her lips. He stands transfixed, his body rigid, his face twitching and sweat pouring from his pores as the Past momentarily rousing itself from a long slumber, takes over his brain pushing out the Present, like a sudden, unexpected and unwanted flashback in a movie. But the director, the Present, thinks otherwise. It will not be ignored and in urgent impatience hastens to take centre-stage once again in the form of a violent shake to his shoulder by Javed"s hand. <br><br>"They are waiting for your decision, miya", Javed leans towards him and whispers in his ear. The Past retreats in slow-painful-motion and his eyes focus on the men around him, all of them standing now, some already walking towards the door. "They are going to look for Mohan and who knows what will happen if they find him. I think there"s going to be a riot." <br><br>He musters the courage he does not feel. His stomach suddenly feels like a bottomless hole, from which his voice rises in an unnaturally high-pitched octave, "I don"t think we should go after Mohan. After all we don"t even know if he did it." He falters, as the stark image of a mutilated body flashes across his mind. But the rage that rises falls back defeated into that black pit of despair. "Let the police find the killer. The Koran does not say that we must take the law into our own hands. Does the Khan Saheb agree?" <br><br>All eyes are now on the head priest who is looking at him with a quizzical expression. He nods imperceptibly. <br><br>"But we cannot let the killer go scot-free." An angry voice says from the door. <br><br>"But we don"t know who the killer is." His heart is now pounding almost as loud as his voice. <br><br>"We"ll go to their mohalla and "ask" until the killer confesses". <br><br>"But it is my daughter that has been killed and I do not wish blood on my hands or on my conscience". <br><br>"Are you saying that we just sit around while "they" rape and murder our women and kids?" <br><br>"All I"m saying is that let the police find the killer and let law take its course." <br><br>"But he might never be found.." "Or it might take years." <br><br>"Then let"s wait for a month and see, if they police have not found him, we"ll meet once again and decide." <br><br>He turns to Khan Saheb "I have to be with my family.", bends his head once, turns and hurries out of the room, the light had begun to hurt his eyes. Javed catches up with him and they fasten their pace towards home. <br><br>"You most certainly averted a riot, miya. Those people in there were ready to kill any man belonging to Mohan"s community." <br><br>When they reach home, he asks all the mourners gathered there to leave. Wailing women and silent men are perplexed by this strange behavior but leave one by one. After Javed leaves too, he takes Saif by his hand and they go and sit beside Shabana on the floor mat, his arms around them both. They sit there for a long time, tightly knit in their grief, oblivious of hunger and thirst, only conscious of the pain that somehow seems to have dug a hollow in their inside and filled it up agonisingly with itself. By midnight Saif is leaning against him asleep and Shabana has fallen into a troubled slumber in his lap. Only he sits through the agonised night, feeling the soft touch of curls on his cheeks like fairy wings and echoes of an angel voice, gurgling with glee, saying "Abbu, catch me.." <br><br>Life has this funny way of flowing on and taking you along in the flow. And so, as the weeks pass they force themselves to get used to the silences between broken-off sentences, as though they are waiting for another voice to finish them off. And those who disappear from our lives, they reappear occasionally in photo albums, smiling life-like, or in stray toys we thought we had thrown away. And on our tongues, as names we somehow<br>forget to forget.  <br><br>His nightly ritual of tip-toeing into the bedroom well past midnight continues, and on most nights his heart shrinks with concern and swells with love as, by the diffused glow from the streetlight outside, he sees Shabana"s face. A frown sitting between her brows, face still glistening with drying tears and she in the arms of a pained sleep.  <br><br>But today she is awake as he sidles into bed beside her.  She is turned towards him, her face resting on her palm and her hair loose and softly coiled on the pillow. "You haven"t slept yet, it"s well past midnight." <br><br>"I want my Gudiya back," she says by way of answer. <br><br>"But Shabu, you know it is not possible, Khuda ko yeh manzoor nahi hai."  <br><br>"I don"t care, I want her back. If not her then another like her." <br><br>Her eyes are like black glowing coals in the semi-darkness as she moves towards him, her presence suddenly strong and heady on his senses. <br><br>He freezes immediately. <br><br>"Do something, Shoaib, do anything, but give me a daughter". <br><br>She has raised herself up slightly and her free hand is clutching urgently at his kurta lapel. She must have seen the flicker of desire in his eyes for she relaxes her grip and starts to unbutton his kurta. <br><br>"Shabu..some other day. please." fear pounding the chest on which her hands are busy. <br><br>And then looking down at him, gazing directly into his eyes, she says, "What are you afraid of, miya? That I"ll find out you are not the man I married?" <br><br>"You knew.." It feels like he has been struck by a thunderbolt, ".you knew all along?" <br><br>"No, not in the beginning, then I began to have suspicions, which were slowly confirmed, but I didn"t know what to do or whom to ask."  <br><br>She pauses, her eyes still steadily looking into his, "I thought about it for a long time, especially after Gudiya died.", her face softens with wistfulness and a curious mixture of pain and love shines in her eyes. <br><br>"I realised how happy you had made my children, how whole-heartedly they had accepted you as their father, even more than they had their own father. That drunken, miserable man, all he would do was beat us up, he only spared Gudiya, but that was because she could hide herself well." She fights with the hardness that has somehow crept into her eyes and her voice, bravely fighting back the tears. <br><br>Then the pain disappears from her eyes and only love remains, "finally I realised that it is not enough for a marriage to be solemnised in front of society, you don"t become life-partners by law, you have to earn the right with love. And you opened your heart so completely, I had no choice but to let you walk into mine, aur phir bas rooh se rooh mil gayee." <br><br>And gazing into those shining eyes he sees complete acceptance. And a love that had  transcended mere details like community, caste, religion, or even a piece of paper concretising a ceremony. <br><br>And taking Shabana into his arms for the first time, and surrendering completely to her womanly softness, the three words "the third choice" flashes unexpectedly across his mind. <br><br>~~~<br></font><br><br><br><br><BR>]]></description><pubDate>Wed, 25 Jun 2008 09:28:31 +0530</pubDate><link>http://blackswan.rediffiland.com/blogs/2008/06/25/The-third-choice.html</link></item></channel></rss>